updated

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, 'Please come over here and help
Me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get
Started.'

Her boyfriend asks, 'What is it supposed to be when it's finished?'

The blonde says, 'According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster.'

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over
The table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to
Her and says,

'First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to
Assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster.'

He takes her hand and says, 'Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a
Nice cup of tea, and then ..' he said with a deep sigh, . .. . .. . .. .








'Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box.'

One day a blond walks into a doctors office with both of her ears burnt.

The doctor askes her what had happened.

She says, "well... when I was ironing my work suit the phone rang and I mistakanly picked up the iron instead of the phone.

"Well that explains one ear, but what about the other."

"The bastard called again"

My wife looked in the mirror and said: "I am looking fat, old and ugly. Please, give me a compliment, I really need it."
I said: "Your eyes work perfectly."

James bond was on a top secret mission. He had to break into the house of a suspect. Once inside he started searching but he saw two scary eyes in the dark. They asked:
– Who are you?
– My name is Bond, James Bond. And you?
– My name is Bull, Pitbull.

duh wkwkkw dumb blonde!

hoho.. thanks for the funny joke, fritz..

updated guys..

A man is sunbathing nude at beach

A little girl comes up to him
so he covers his privates with newspaper

Little girl - What's under there?

Man - A bird

Girl goes away
Man falls asleep

He wakes up in a hospital and
is in great pain

A Dr & cop are at his bed

Dr - Do u remember what happend ?

Man - I don't know
I fell asleep on the beach after talking to a little girl

Cop - I talked to the girl n she said,

" I did nothing to the man
but while he was sleeping
I played with his bird

Then it spit at me !
so I broke its neck
burnt its nest
&
smashd its two little
eggs! :p

NEVER LIE TO KIDS!=)):D;)